favorite moments of an adoption

meeting your new siblings

One of the biggest questions you might be asking yourself: how long will it take for me to get along with my new siblings? The answer is simple, but not exactly what you might want to hear. Without sugarcoating it, here’s the truth: there’s no way of knowing. It depends on multiple factors. But before you have a breakdown and decide that adoption isn’t for you, don’t worry—we can tell you what these factors are so that there are no surprises when it comes time for them to meet each other!

The first factor is whether or not your new siblings have met each other before. If they haven’t met each other before, they might find themselves overwhelmed by meeting someone who is a total stranger (even if they are really excited about having another sibling). If they have met each other before, though, then their excitement can only grow as their friendship strengthens!

Another factor is your personality. For example: if you are shy and quiet around others, then that can make bonding with new people much trickier than someone who has more of an outgoing personality type like some famous actor or actress from movies/TV shows etc…

when your new parents first see you

  • You’ll know when it’s time to tell your parents.
  • If you feel ready, telling your parents is a good idea, and there are many ways to do so. You may want to write them a letter like the one I wrote my mom. Or you could call them and come out on the phone. You could also take this route: When my parents were visiting me in New York City for Thanksgiving of 2011, I asked if we could go for a walk after dinner one night so I could tell them something important in person.

You can also choose not to be the one who tells your parents (you’ll likely have an agency social worker or other professional with you at that meeting).

  • What should you expect from your new parents? First of all: congrats! This is an exciting time for both of you—but it can be scary too. It’s important that they read up on trans identities and issues before they meet you, so they can best support you as their child. There are lots of different resources available — check our list of books! Your relationship is going to take some time to develop as well—there will hopefully be trust building, getting-to-know-you moments, bonding experiences and more—and it won’t happen overnight. That said: no parent is perfect; there may be times when they say hurtful things or aren’t supportive enough; there may even be times when they just aren’t ready enough — but remember that this doesn’t mean that they don’t love you or want what’s best for you! Making mistakes is part of being human; learning from those mistakes and doing better next time is also part of being human — and as long as both sides are trying their hardest, things should work out in the end.

One way we’ve found helpful at Out Proud Families has been asking new or prospective adoptees what kind of parents they’re looking for (or if we’re working w/ad

when you first meet your new parents or siblings

There is no feeling quite like the first moment you meet a new family member you’re about to adopt. It’s exciting and scary, surreal and amazing, all at once.

In that moment, you realize your life is about to change forever. You don’t know yet how much that person will bring into your life, but you feel a connection immediately.

getting to know your new home

As you begin to get to know your new home, here are some things to think about:

  • Is it safe? Are there fire alarms? A first aid kit stocked with everything you need? Smoke alarm functional batteries? How about a working carbon monoxide detector and fire extinguisher for emergencies? These are easy issues to fix, but it’s important to make sure that your home is safe from any potential dangers. After all, whatever else happens in the future, no one can take away the memories of the time you saved someone’s life by using a fire extinguisher.
  • What do you need vs. what do you want? Do you like your new neighborhood or does it make you feel uncomfortable? What do your neighbors look like and how do they interact with each other—are they friendly and helpful or closed off and unapproachable? Do they own pets or keep gardens—is that something that’s important to you or something that makes living in this space difficult for personal reasons (like allergies)? What are the nearby transportation options like—is there an easy bus route, bike paths, sidewalks leading wherever you need to go if walking is an option (and if not, why not)? Is this a place where people raise families because of its excellent local schools or a place where professionals live because of its convenient proximity to their workplaces via public transit? Will this be a permanent space for your family or is it better suited for temporary stays as part of a long-term plan involving many moves throughout different cities around North America over time before settling down somewhere permanently when ready (i.e., college years)?
  • How can I make my new home feel like home?

being welcomed by the community

You are joining a new family. This is not only your parents, but also your siblings and grandparents. You might even have aunts and uncles, or cousins! This is the start of many relationships that you will have for the rest of your life.

You are joining a community. Your neighborhood, church, school and community groups all welcome you as part of their family now. You can make friends who will be in your life forever.

You are exploring a new city, town or country! There are so many interesting and exciting things to do in your new home: museums, theaters, restaurants and parks for you to explore and enjoy!

You will probably be experiencing new food or culture with your new family and friends. Try everything that comes along: it is all delicious when the person serving it loves you!”

bonding with people who will be in your life forever

One of the most rewarding aspects of adoption is the relationships that it creates. You bond with your child, and they bond with you. You also have the chance to meet and interact with people who have been in your child’s life from the beginning, like their birth family and foster families. One of my favorite moments was meeting our daughter’s foster family for the first time. They had spent a long time imparting all their knowledge of her personality, preferences, and background to us. It was wonderful to see their faces as they met their daughter for the first time since she had joined our home. The relationship between a foster parent and a child is special; I was happy that we were able to create new memories together as well as be part of each other’s lives forever.

The adoption process is a wonderful experience and one that is worth every moment.

Often, the adoption process is a long and sometimes difficult one, but it is filled with ups and downs. It requires patience, but once you are through it, you will be so happy and feel like part of a new family. It will be worth it!

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